okay..haha..this is my cut-ed thumb..hehehe.=)

okay..bad news..my chinese oral is on my birthday..

bored bored bored..

school till 2 plus.oral to 4 plus 5..

den come back..tuition to 10..

there goes my birthday man..haha.

sorry people.cannot date me already.haha.

today, i msg her..

i msg her and ask her for the final and last time..

do i ever stand a chance to be with you?

but the answer is a no..okay, i'll face it..i wont bother you anymore..

for the past one year,

i've been waiting asking and pleading for this chance,

but i was not given the chance, not even ONCE..

and it was rejection all the way.. i've been giving in to you for the past one year plus..

not because i'm afraid of you..

but because i just love you too much.

and the too much has been abused..

when there are problems,

you will turn to me automatically..

but when there isn't..

you wont..

you've taken my kindness as my weakness.

but since you do not know how to appreciate it..

forget it.

i got nothing more to say..

and please, if in future,

dun msg me to say that you like me or what..

coz you will mess up my life again.

and if i were to find a girlfriend at that time..

it wont be fair to her..

coz i've given you a long time to make a decision..

but you did not treasure it but rejected me with many reasons..

different in religions and all sorts..all my friends all says that it is all bullshit..but nevermind, i accepted all your reasons.

so please, if ever one day you like me..dun tell me..coz i will be lost again..and i'm afraid i'll fall in love with you again..coz i know i will.
i wish you all the best. and pray that you will be happy always. and i shall take away all your saddness..

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chan pui yi anna, i once loved you.

but fate messed it all up.

okay, long time no blog..today had a day camp at bottle tree park..the camp was fun..and our instructors are wonderful..many things are going through my mine.a cousin of mine had just got married, the guy..was with her for 10 years and now they finally got married.it's wonderful right? at first i was thinking..if he can do it, i'm sure i can wait for her for 10 years..but the 10 years is different in these cases..and i understand the meaning of 10 years..they ARE TOGETHER for 10 years..but for me, it will/might be WAITING for 10 years and there's no assurance that we will be together..see the different..and no matter what i do, what i say, what i think..will never brings us together UNLESS, a miracle happens. which i doubt it will..my mind is in a complete whirl..i wish to move on, but i'm afraid when i moved on, only den you might like me..and for the new girl that i like..it will be unfair, coz i'm quite sure, if i know you like me, i will surely go back to you..i'm stuck now, can someone save me? gohonzon, please make a decision for me..there are many good girls around me..but why? why of all girls i fell for you..i did use someone to help me forget you..it works, but for a while only..i feel that its unfair for that girl..but i really had no more choice other to use this..do you understand what i'm feeling now? i may appear i am HAPPY..but you never know what i'm feeling inside..i just wish that i can just hack care all about you..and all my life will be back to normal..i just love you..but everything just messed it up..